“Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;) That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth. And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.”
(Ephesians 6:1-4)
God is a God of order, and this wonderful reality is evident in all His works of creation. It is also evident in the social and civil laws He gave to Moses, in addition to the Ten Commandments, for His people to live by. As a result, every lawful authority proceeds from Him and reflects, in a limited way, His sovereign rule.[1]
The proper relationships between parents and children, masters and servants, rulers and subjects are not inventions of man but institutions established by God’s orderly wisdom. Therefore, obedience rendered within these lawful relations is not only our social duty, it is also our spiritual duty to the Lord.
This passage in Ephesians 6, for example, specifically addresses the order God established in the family. Children are commanded to obey and honor their parents because such obedience is right before God. Parents, in turn, are commanded to raise their children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. The home is therefore designed to be a place where divine truth governs both authority and submission.
Yet sin has deeply corrupted these relationships. Children naturally rebel against restraint, seeking independence from authority. And parents abuse their authority through anger, inconsistency, neglect, or failure to instruct their households faithfully. The disorder so often seen in homes simply reflects the deeper disorder of hearts estranged from God.
This corruption also appears in broader relationships. Men either submit slavishly to human authority, or they reject rightful authority entirely in the name of personal freedom. Scripture rejects both extremes. The believer is commanded to obey lawful authority “in the Lord,” meaning under the higher authority of Christ. Earthly obedience is never absolute. Christ alone possesses ultimate dominion over conscience and soul. So when earthly commands oppose the truth, obedience to Christ must prevail.
True liberty is not independence from God’s order but joyful submission within it. Indeed, service to Christ brings perfect freedom because it restores the soul to its proper relationship with God. Through His grace, hearts are renewed to love righteousness and submit willingly to God’s design, serving Him not as slaves under condemnation but as sons reconciled through Christ.
Contemplations:
- My Resistance to God’s Order. I can see how often my heart resists restraint and lawful authority. Even when outward obedience is present, inward pride and self-will remain active beneath the surface. This passage forces me to admit that my rebellion often appears in subtle forms: impatience, stubbornness, resentment, or refusal to receive correction humbly.
- My Failures Within Relationships. When I consider the relationships God has established, I can see many areas where I have failed and need to repent. I have not always honored others as I ought, not submitted where I should, nor carried responsibilities with tenderness and wisdom. At times I have spoken harshly, acted selfishly, or neglected opportunities. These issues reveal a deeper disorder within my own heart that still needs sanctifying grace.
- My Tendency Toward Outward Obedience Alone. I recognize how easy it is for me to behave rightly while my heart remains cold and rebellious. I may fulfill my responsibilities and still lack love, humility, or sincerity before God. This passage reminds me that true obedience includes willing submission flowing from a heart governed by grace. External order alone cannot satisfy the holiness of God.
- My Need for Christ’s Restoring Grace. The more I reflect on these commands, the more clearly I see my need for Christ. Sin has distorted every human relationship and weakened every part of my obedience. Left to myself, I cannot restore what sin has damaged. Yet Christ not only commands holiness, but supplies grace for it. I need His Spirit continually to teach me humility, faithfulness, tenderness, and willing obedience before God.
Prayer (Confession):
Most holy and gracious God, I come before You confessing the disorder and selfishness that sin has produced within my heart. You established holy order in the world and appointed lawful authority for good, yet I confess that I have often resisted Your design through pride, stubbornness, and self-will. Forgive me for the rebellion that still remains within me.
Lord, I confess my failures within the relationships You have given. Where I should have shown honor, patience, tenderness, and faithfulness, I have too often acted selfishly or carelessly. My words have not always reflected grace, my attitudes have not always reflected humility, and my conduct has not always reflected obedience to Christ. Forgive these sins and cleanse me from them.
Too often I perform duties out of habit, appearance, or obligation while my heart remains cold and distracted. Forgive me for outward conformity without inward sincerity. And teach me to obey from love rather than external pressure.
Lord, I confess that my heart still seeks independence and resists submission. Yet true liberty is found only in joyful obedience to Christ. Forgive me for imagining that self-will leads to happiness when it only leads further into disorder and sin.
I also confess the ways I have misused responsibilities entrusted to me. Where I should have encouraged, instructed, or governed wisely, I have sometimes acted impatiently or neglected my duty altogether. Forgive my inconsistency and selfishness, and teach me to reflect Your wisdom and kindness more faithfully.
Renew my heart so that obedience becomes joyful rather than burdensome. Teach me to honor lawful authority rightly while keeping my conscience wholly subject to You above all. Let my relationships increasingly reflect the order, peace, and grace established by Your truth.
Finally, keep me mindful that I am not a servant under fear, but a child adopted through Christ. Let this grace humble me deeply and move me toward more sincere obedience flowing from gratitude and love.
In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.
Further Scripture References for Ephesians 6:1-4:
Proverbs 6:20; Colossians 3:20; Proverbs 23:22; Proverbs 1:8
[1] Nathaniel Heywood, Christ Displayed as the Choicest Gift, and Best Master, (London: printed for Tho. Parkhurst at the Bible and Three Crowns in Cheapside, near Mercers Chapel, 1679), 213-216.
